I know that I created this place for women in the gaming community. However, I also like having the opportunity to share myself and who I am with you ladies here. I spend so much time immersed in a digital world that sometimes it is easy to be swallowed by it.
I have always been better at expressing myself through the written word then out loud. When I attempt to talk sometimes I get so excited that everything just wants to come tumbling out of my mouth at the same time. Which leads to me being very good at confusing people. Writing gives me the opportunity to slow my brain and really think about what I want to say.
Recently, I have been thinking about how my life is so vastly different today then it was just a couple of years ago. How mobile games have made a huge impact on my life and the tumultuous twists and turns that entering the world of gaming has taken me through.
I have always wanted to be a writer but I never would have guessed that my entry into that world would be through gaming. I thought that maybe I would one day write a book that was just purely fun or a book that lined up with my college degree. However, let’s focus back in because if I keep going this direction my whole intent of writing this will be lost.
Commonly I hear from people that one of my biggest strengths is that I have a good heart. Well let me tell you that this heart has gotten me into trouble too. I have a tendency to want to believe the best of people and one of the tough lessons I have learned is that in this community where the majority of your interactions are digital that is something that you cannot always do.
When I first started playing the mobile game that really brought me into this world I met a lot of people. Some of those people I still talk to and some of those people I have purged from my life. However, one day I met someone. Someone that I will not name because that is not my intent in writing this.
This person ultimately helped me make the connections I needed so that gaming became more than a hobby on the side. However, over time they also learned how to manipulate my emotions and took every opportunity they could to control me.
Eventually, I began to catch them in lies and began to see through the facade they had put up. My heart wanted to believe the apologies that were offered and wanted to believe that they had simply made a mistake but that was not the story that I lived. It took a lot for me to be able to get away from them but when I did, well I began to see the bigger picture and the level of deceit was astonishing.
Why am I telling you Ladies this? I am telling you this because to this day it still affects who I am as a person. I am telling you this because I want you to know that it is okay to shut toxic people out of your life and you do not have to feel bad about it and I know many of you ladies have lived this story. I am telling you this because in the gaming community where we exist we are going to meet all types of people.
We will meet the people who support us and become like family and we will meet the people who we need to shut out. I would not change my story because it brought me here, however, I have learned to be more cautious and I have learned that you can have a good heart and still be wise enough to protect it.
Gamer Girl 